Self-Portrait & Invite

I do yoga to ‘Street Fighting Man.’
I am pretty good at eating an orange.
I am very opinionated although I do not care about too many things.
I prefer cool, cloudy weather.
Drinking tea is nice.
I’m President of the Lazyites Club.

If you want to meet me hang out at the Linkyshire coffee shop.


Fly Season

Or summer as it is sometimes called,
Is coming again.
I am not looking forward to it.
The other day, a big ugly fly banged into my head.
Annoying, and just like fly season.
Iceland sounds better.
I think I’ll go there this summer.

For Men: Instructions for a Proper Date

I heard this on the TV the other day on the local Linkyshire station.
I think Mayor Armapple was interviewing a resident psychiatrist…

It was stated with sincerity.

I thought I’d pass it along to you.

  1. Go to a coffee shop.
  2. Get coffee.
  3. Sit down next to a girl you think you like.
  4. Or wait for one to come into the coffee shop. It could take a while.
  5. Strike up a conversation.
  6. Then ask, “Would you like to grab a cup of coffee sometime?”

Keyboard Karma

Bought a new keyboard for my laptop.
Had to use an old keyboard tray to put it on.
Had to turn the table over to install the keyboard tray.
The table was a lot heavier than I anticipated.
Had to find a drill to drill the holes for the tray but
I only had a high speed drill that burned the wood a little…
No permanent damage but…
The keyboard tray forced my sitting position back…
which forced my chair back…
over the edge of the carpet so…
I had to change the direction of the carpet to account for the distance.
But the carpet was dirty so I had to clean up the floor.
But then everything on my desk was out of reach so…
I had to rearrange my desk and then my file cabinet.

It was a lot of work.
I hope my idiocy isn’t permanent.