Hedges

Pinky wanted me to do her hedges.
So I said sure, I’ll do your hedges.
Then she told me the history of the hedges,
how they didn’t fit together the way they should,
how gaps appear if you cut them too close,
how everything bad happens to the hedges.
I said, ‘don’t worry about the hedges,’ I’ll do them.
But she kept going about it.
I told her not to worry about it.
But that didn’t work for Pinky.
I told her the best thing to do was to go inside
and not worry about the hedges.
But that didn’t work either.
She really had a thing about her hedges.
I told her the best advice, go inside,
lie down, and don’t think about hedges.
I told her if that didn’t work to be calm, lie down,
and don’t think about the hedges and then to
shut up about the hedges and then be calm.
She went inside.
I took care of the hedges and they were beautiful.
Everyone in the neighborhood said they were good hedges
after I was done.

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